BIG PLANS

every fourth we
roll to the motor
city; my whole family

crowds around
fireworks and food,
pool parties full

of blown-up bodies,
the rafts slick with suntan
oil left behind
by old bloated flesh.

as detroit explodes
in the background, we glisten
and float as if death
were afraid of water
and good times.

JUST THIS

move through this
world in pursuit
of justice and you

can expect to find
the opposite:
the randomness of this

reality resists
rules evenly applied
across all acts and types.

so try
as you might,
it's hard not to

arrive at this:
life is

not fair,
and justice is

neither here
nor there.

TAKE ME

there are nights when dying
first occurs to me -- as in pre-
deceasing -- as one

possible
viable
solution to others'
suffering.

there is nothing worse than feeling

helpless. and you know words
are worthless.

and so you rehearse
being willing to
go first.